Parachuting canceled due to window-problems.

Parachute plan canceled.
Everything seemed to work perfectly fine. I managed - with Phoebe's help - to knot myself into some belts and attach the cuddly blanket from the sofa to it. I stole one of Mommy's scarfs and wrapped it around my head for protection. Did not find any glasses, but decided it had to work without them. I could already smell freedom and tons of food. Ruska ready for take off.... - and then I didn't manage to open the window.
Well, it is unfortunate, but I will find another solution eventually. To be honest, parachuting sounds a little bit scary after all. Maybe I should pack myself in a box and send it somewhere. I bet you can find petfoodshopadresses on the internet. That would be a marvelous place to send myself to. Then again... I'd probably be in cars. With the box. That would maybe be too scary, too. If I... no, way too scary.
An adoption ad online! Pawesome! No, wait... if I get adopted, that means new humans.... maybe other cats... maybe they have dogs... maybe even less food. No, no, that's not good.
I think maybe I should stay here. Yeah, that sounds good. Yes.

It is not too bad here, actually. If I think about it. At least we get food and it tastes really good. And on Saturday we had a women's night with Mommy. Phoebe was too small, she was playing on her own. First I watched Mommy sitting in the big box in which our litterboxes are usually. It was filled with water and extremely suspicious. She asked me if I wanted to come in, but it was too scary. And I think maybe she wasn't all serious about that.
Afterwards we watched a movie called Sex and the City. It's for women. I am a woman. Cat...woman. Anyways, it was fun. I tried to steal Mommy's chocolate, but she said I couldn't have it. I didn't get wine either. But I got some treats. It's something!

When it come to the food situation - things have gone from bad to worse. I actually caught Phoebe eating the rest of the food in my bowl today. It's supposed to be the other way around. That is just so wrong.

-Ruska

This was my parachuting helmet.

Parachute-Ruska

Hello humans!

Oh, boy, what a weird devil's day! Daddy was home, you know? Daddy is usually always at work at devil's day, but today he was home. In fact, he was the one deviling today, Mommy only needed to mop. They were gone for a while during the day to look at animals. I really don't understand that. After all, they have two perfectly fine and very watchable animals right here. Hello. *waves*
In the evening they were planning to watch other Finnish humans. Or something like that. When they came home, Mommy didn't feel too well. She was whining around and lying on the sofa. She looked pretty much like Ruska actually. Hihi. She said she had ice coffee and it didn't do any good to her stomach. Ice coffee. That sounds delicious. I ate ice cream once. No, actually twice. But I only got a wee bit, cause Mommy said it is not good for my? RIGHT - stomach! And now she has a lot of ice cream with coffee herself and then she gets all confused about why her stomach does not like it? Really, I don't understand humans.

Ruska is planning her escape since yesterday. She does not like the new regulation of less food. She made plans all night. I think they involve a parachute. I am not so sure if a parachuting Ruska is the best idea. She is even afraid of the mop, I bet parachuting is much more scary.

Here is a part of Ruska's plan. She drew it herself.

I just hope the heaven thing is not meant literally. I mean, she does not even have a parachute. She says she is going to take care of it. Oh, god.

I have to say I like the new food regulation. As we get smaller portions I manage to eat mine all up. Ruska, too, obviously. Then we can't eat before we get more. And by then I am hungry again and manage the smaller portion again. So in the end I always get all the food that is meant for me and Ruska can't steal any. She really should lose some weight anyways. I wonder if the parachute would even hold her. If she had one.

The only thing that worries me is the warning sign next to the food bowls. It looks like this:

In case you can't clearly see it, it says
"Planning on...
...peeing somewhere?
...stealing treats?
...climbing somewhere you don't belong?

...destroying something?

...scratching Mommy?
...making a mess?
THINK TWICE"
and then there is the picture of a cat which is nailed to the wall through its ears! D:
Ruska says the cat in the picture is supposed to me be. There is some resemblance... maybe... but that is only by accident I am sure.

Last but not least: here is my awesome selfie from yesterday!

#hipstercat #yoln

(yoln is not a typo, cats don't live only once, suckaaaas!)

Byeee!
-Pheebs