Life here starts being normal. Somehow. Daddy is going to work and Mommy is a desperate housewife. But she got invited to talk to people who might give her work. Probably then I have to be the woman in the house, I guess. I just won't devil, I can promise that much! Yesterday Mommy suggested that I could find a job instead of her. I could wear a little collar shirt and have a little briefcase and go to a boring office and be like business cat. That sounds fun. The only problem is, that there are people. And I don't like people. Also, there would be an annoying amount of fur on my collar shirt. That would be non-serious. I can't build my career with cat fur all over my collar shirt! How would that look? And then Phoebe would be alone at home. Unless, of course, I would get her into my company. She could be the overly eager trainee or something. Always rushing around with a Starbucks cup, being all hipster and stuff. That totally sounds like her. Or then we just let Mommy find a job and I continue eating and sleeping. Yeah. Yeah, that sounds good.
What I don't like about our home is that there is just waaaay too much noise here! The other day, something was exploding. Probably. In the wall. It was very loud in the wall. Maybe the wall was angry? Or someone was deviling in the wall? I don't know. Mommy said it's the neighbors. They are living in the wall? Are they small? They must be. Walls are not big. How can small neighbors make big noises? I don't know. I am confused.
Mommy brought more new food today. Awwwwww, great!
I like new food! We get many different foods now, not only the same boring shit. Mommy says it's also good for our bellies. I am sad we don't get the one yummy food anymore, but Phoebe's belly is always making the rumblies when we get it and she gets diarrhea and... I shouldn't go deeper into that, should I? Nah. So anyways. New food! YAY!
I tried a new diet today as well.... Mommy keeps complaining about my weight, so maybe I should change something. Mommy was having salad for lunch. She says it is very healthy and - AAAAH THE WALL NEIGHBORS ARE LOUD AGAIN! HELP! PANIC! DOOM! - what? where was I? Oh, the salad. So yes. I tasted the salad, as it is healthy and does not make me fat. It was not yummy. No. Really not. Ew.
SALAAAAD! No. Never again. Ew. No.
Yesterday Phoebe was lost. She was literally gone for hours! Mommy didn't seem to be worried. Strange. At some point during my search for her I was running over the new chair and I heard Phoebe complaining that I should take my fat legs off her ribs. But I couldn't still see her! But then she came out from under the blanket. Oh. Hi Phoebe. Hmh.
Mommy said it is good that we are inside and can't actually get lost. We might die. It is a dangerous city out there. She saw a man almost dying today. A car hit him. Cars are evil. Friends of mine lost all nine lives at once through cars. Some of my step-siblings did, too. Mikko lost 8 out of 9. But the guy Mommy saw didn't die after all. Maybe humans have many lives as well? I don't know. What's the sense in life? To be or not to be? To meow or... OH, get food, gotta go, BYES!
-Ruska
p.s. Mommy's friend was once quitting life to become a burrito. She became a chair eventually... but anyways, I decided to also quit life to become a burrito. Or purrito as Mommy's other friend suggested. That purrilliant.
AAAAH now Phoebe eats my food. Sonofadog.
Me as a burrito.
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